Thursday, October 27, 2011

I miss you.

Muka suci je. Hehe.

Really. I do. I miss you. So much. Super duper.

Be back soon pleaseeeee.

Can't wait to celebrate our 6th anniversary baby <3

p/s : I wish every night when I close my eyes, the last person that I see is you, the last voice that I hear is yours and the moment I wake up, the first person that would wish me good morning is also you. Always and forever be sayang.


                                                                                                 Missing you,
                                                                                                            Myra

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Sometimes


Assalamualaikum.

Bestow some lights upon me, God.

Sometimes I wish I'm a different person. Sometimes I wish I live a different life. Sometimes I wish I could be far away. Sometimes I wish I don't have to play strong. Sometimes I wish I could walk without fear. Sometimes I wish I can wear a smile. Sometimes I wish I am not me at all. Sometimes I just hate being this girl. Sometimes I wish I could erase everything. Sometimes I wish I don't have to worry anything. Sometimes I wish I am capable. Sometimes I wish I could be better.

Throughout this life, for all these wishes I wished. I know that all I could ever wish for is, I could have been better. Even if I wish a thousand times of how I wanted things to change and be so different from what it is, it can never turn out the way I hoped. For things I felt incomplete was actually me that feels partly empty. Don't you feel like this life is so long, like  an un-ended journey? That pain caused me a lot of my dead feelings. You caused me a lot of pain, and I wonder why. 

Everyone has their times. The time of being unsatisfied with things around them. Everyone has their moment, and sad to say, this is mine. 

The most significant wish that I could ever want to wish for is, 
not to have the feeling of wishing all those wishes above. 

I'm a disgrace to myself, and once again like any other time, I let myself down again. 

p/s : I'm sorry, but I've tried. So hard that it kills me inside.

                                                                                    Delusions,
                                                                                                     Myra
                                                                                                                    

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Day 1 : In.

Assalamualaikum.


So harini first day my one and only masuk hospital. Tomorrow morning is the surgery. Haish. Kita yang tersentap, dia relax je. Nervous nyaaaa.  Seriously, I'm scared for you. Eventhough you always say you're okay. Tak sanggup tengok tahuuu. Hmm. Kita sama-sama doa kay, InsyaAllah semua berjalan dengan lancar and baik-baik je. Ni semua kerja Tuhan kan ? So, I'm praying my best for you. Hang in there. Get well sooner than soon okay ? I love you super duper much sayang.

p/s : Bila sayang dah sihat, kita pergi minum kat Dome lagi kay ? Or where ever you want. Cepat sihat ye pakcik ! Teehee. <3

                                                                                              With love,
                                                                                                                 Myra

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Mungkin Padanya



  Padanya awan mendung itu sudah berarak pergi. 
Padanya satu kisah itu sudah ditamati.
 Siapa tahu dia masih mahu menguji. 
Mungkinkah supaya dirinya tidak melupai.
 Mungkinkah demi dirinya tidak dilukai. 
Kebenaran yang cuba Dia beri.
Menguji kesabaran yang sudah tiada lagi. 
Mencarik kekuatan yang hampir mati. 

                                      Yang jatuh bangunnya,
                                                                        Myra

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

KENAPA SAYA SUKA ANNAS EASKEY ?

Assalamualaikum. 

So, just now buka website Annas Easkey. Siapa tak kenal kann, he is none other than the famous and talented Malaysian photographer ! To be honest, I am proud to say that we have such talent and passion for photography  in Malaysia ! I am a fan of photography myself, dan saya sangat-sangat meminati Annas Easkey's photos! ( Banyak sangat exclamation mark ni maksudnya saya sangat excited okay ! )

Okay, the question is KENAPA SAYA SUKA ANNAS EASKEY ?

Hmm.
 
Easy peasy lah Annas =)

Normal people take pictures but professionals shoot them. And the way you shoot is just simply AMAZING ! Browsing through your photographs, rasa macam tengok album America's Next Top Model  tahuuu ! All the pictures are just right, macam kena je dengan background and the colour mixture of the picture. Oh Oh ! And what I love the most about you Annas Easkey is, your photography has a story in it. Like it's not just all about the perfect shot, but it's beyond that. When I see your photograph, I can feel something like a story is being told with just a snapshot. And you know who shoots pictures like that ? YOU, ANNAS EASKEY ! Seriously,  you shoot as great as Nigel Barker. My favourites are pictures that are full with emotion, like the 4th picture at the top from left. That is honestly REMARKABLE ! I love love love it. And the picture beside it pun is my favourite. I could tell every story that is in your photographs ! 

THESE ARE JUST RARE AND BEAUTIFUL <3


Okay, for example, the picture of the girl looking back. That is also listed in my favs. This picture, for me is about a girl who looked very strong on the outside, but inside she's struggling like hell. Seorang yang, ada masanya nak mengulangi masa silam nya, tapi tak mampu kerana masa itu adalah bukan mainan yang bisa diputar semula. Warna hitam putih tu pula melambangkan betapa beratnya apa yang telah dia lalui sebelum ni, and how she went through all that, only she knows. The white hairband that she wears melambangkan yang kini dia dah lebih kuat, dan tak perlu lagi dia tutup muka and hide. Like she is saying, it's time for me to stand out from all this misery. Get out from all this black and whites, and perhaps colour her life a bit more. But even whatever happens next, she will never forget what she went through from the past, and what she learnt. The picture is, as if telling that, the history might never change even if I look back a thousand times, but I'm still gonna fight through. The sad face shows that she's leaving it all behind, the misery. The lights behind shows that, there's a chance for her and a bright future awaits. The blurry background tells that none of the past or what people say about her matters, like she doesn't want to care anymore, she has to fight and stand out ! That is what I could tell about this picture, the story hidden beneath it. Bukan semua gambar boleh dikhabarkan cerita yang tersirat disebaliknya, hanya apabila gambar itu kena dengan masa dan keadaan nya. Dan orang yang boleh snap pictures like that is seseorang seperti awak, Annas.

Sincerely, I don't really care of winning this but I just thought that you should know that. That such talent you have, shall not be wasted. Keep on doing this cool job Annas ! I love your work, and will always be a fan ! 


 ** Ingat lagi waktu first time buka page Annas, I thought it was a professional photographer from US or anything, but tengok-tengok eh cakap melayu lah !  And I love that you're not arrogant like certain photographers. Hee !

p/s : Takpe ke I wrote in English ye ? Huu, sorry !


              So Annas Easkey, I hope this is good enough to tell you how great you are =)

                                         Sincerely,
                                                                                                     Myra

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Apologies.

Allah lebih faham kita.

Sayang, I really miss you and I am very sorry. I've been a terrible person. I'm just so stressed out, and I just can't seem to handle it any better. I 'm sorry that you have always been the place I threw out everything. I'm sorry I don't appreciate you enough. You deserve so much better of me. I think I might have a serious problem with myself, and I'll try to be better. I know I've said that a thousand times, but please be patient with me. I feel like losing myself and I feel deeply lost. Sometimes I just don't know where to go, and I don't know where to turn to, and finally I just cried. Maybe there's just too much that I felt inside my chest that it felt as if it'll burst any moment. All I can say right now is, I'm really sorry for everything. May I ask for you to always support me? I need you always, and I love you so so much sayang.

                                                                                                Sorry,
                                                                                                         Myra

Entri untuk diri.

Frust sangat-sangat sekarang ni. Ya Allah, kenapa lahhh aku ni keras hati sangat. Kenapa susah sangat aku nak terima kekurangan dalam hidup ni. Tek reti bersyukur. Ada je yang kau nak bidas kan? Kau dah ada semua benda mira, apa lagi yang kau harapkan ? Kau sendiri tak sempurna, jangan nak berangan sangat lah. Cubalah bersyukur, appreciate everything you have. Dia sanggup buat apa je untuk kau, apa lagi tak cukup ? Cinta dia hanya untuk kau selamanya, and you know that. Apa lagi yang tak cukup ? Dia sanggup buat apa je untuk kau, dia tak pernah minta balasan. Apa lagi yang kau nak daripada dia? Dia tu yang sebenarnya yang terlalu baik untuk kau, kau tu tak layak pun untuk cinta yang dia dah berikan selama ni. Apa yang kau buat, cuma sakitkan dia. Itu je yang kau tahu kan. Ego kau tu sampai ke langit pun tak tercecah. Tolonglah, I'm begging you to appreciate. Jangan sampai benda dah takde depan mata, baru kau nak menyesal. Kadang-kadang aku pun menyampah dengan perangai kau ni. Kau betul-betul dah berubah mira. Mana pergi mira yang dulunya penyayang? Yang lembut kata-katanya, yang baik budi dan hati dia. Yang banyak bersabar. Mana pergi perempuan tu? Please change mira, I know you can. Deep down, kau bukan macam ni. Aku tahu  kau tertekan lately, tapi sabarlah. Apa jadi pada prinsip kau tu? 'Biar orang buat kita, jangan kita buat orang'. Mana pergi senyuman bahagia kau? Mana pergi tawa kau? Kenapa sekarang cuma tangisan yang mengiringi malam kau? Mana pergi kekuatan kau sayang? Kau kuat, kau dah lalui semua ni dah berapa tahun. Tapi takde yang tau kan? Kau tak pernah tunjuk sesiapa, kau hadapi sorang-sorang. Depan orang, kau ceria, kau senyum, kau gelak. Tapi aku tahu kau tengah menangis kat dalam. Aku tahu apa yang kau lalui, aku mengerti, aku faham sangat. Kau lembut dan manja orangnya. Tapi lama-kelamaan aku tengok kau banyak simpan perasaan, fikiran kau fikir melalut. You deserve every tiny bit of evertything in life mira, you just don't realise that. Kau nak sesuatu tapi kau selalu tinggal tengah jalan. Bangunlah mira, kau kuat ! Kenapa kau selalu jatuh tersungkur tengah jalan and menangis? Kalau tu dapat reda kan kau, menangis lah sayang, kau tahu aku ada. Aku selalu ada bila orang lain tak tahu, bila kau tebalkan muka kau daripada kesedihan kau. Bila kau ketawa dalam tangisan kau yang mendayu-dayu dalam hati kau tu. Berhentilah berharap mira, kerana harapan hanya akan menjatuhkan kau, kau pun tahu kan? Selalu apa yang kau harapkan, akhirnya mesti takkan jadi. Jadi janganlah berharap sangat, aku taknak tengok kau terluka lagi. Cukuplah, dah lama kau bersedih. Kejarlah impian kau sekarang, sebelum terlepas. Jangan terlepas pandang benda remeh. Those little things are the one that made big things remarkable. Banyak kan sabar, Allah sentiasa bersama dengan orang yang sabar kan sayang? Hargai apa yang kau ada, hargai keluarga kau, adik-beradik kau, dan kekasih kau. Dia sentiasa ada untuk kau, jadi kau tak perlu takut. Satu je mira, jangan pernah lupa jasa orang pada kau. Kalau kau rasa sedih sangat, baca lah entry ni. Kuatkan semangat. Ni adalah hatimu memberi kekuatan pada mu. Jangan terus bersedih sayang, sesungguhnya Kami bersama mu selalu. 






                                                                             Yang sentiasa ada,
                                                                                                          Hati-mu